Pinoy New Year’s Eve Countdown!

Celebrate New Year with safe noise makers!

Shoe/Underwear Bomber: Cause and Effect

underwear bomber, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, shoe bomber, Richard Reid, naked flight, TSA,

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We Interrupt This Blog To Bring You An Important Public Service Announcement

Huwag iboto ang mga tetano sa Congreso at Senado. Tama na, sobra na! Bawasan ang walang silbing tetano ng bayan.

Iwas Boga at Paputok!

Marami na namam ang masasaktan at mapuputulang ng daliri sa darating na bagong taon Huwag bumili ng Sinturon ni Hudas, Mother Rocket,Super Lolo, Bawang, Pla-Pla, Five Star, Whistle Bombs at Boga sa palengke. Taon taon rin ay maraming bata ang nalalason sa watusi na akala nila ay kendi. Konting ingatz mga bata. Have a safe new year's eve from My Pinoy Humor Blog.

original photo via manila times

Merry Millionaire Balato?

Ang daming nag-email na humihirit ng balato from My Pinoy Humor Blog. And my long lost kamaganak are coming out of the woodwork, me Nigerian pa! Sori po at napurnada ang balato nimyo. Well let me explain, i'ts like...well... basicaly... actually.... parang ganito ang nagyari, panoorin na lang ninyo.

Merry Millionaire! WE WON!

Anak ng huweteng! Merry Christmas talaga! Goodbye blogging world!

Pinoy NORAD Santa Tracker Live

It's Christmas eve, almost midnight na here in North America at medyo late yata si Santa. Where the heck is Santa Claus. Teka minute, heto po ang latest update from Pinoy NORAD Santa Tracker. Namataan si Santa na naipit daw ng traffic sa kahabaan ng EDSA. Sa me pagitan ng Boni Ave. at Shaw Boulevard, malapit daw siya sa me Mercury Drug, Igan. Kung hindi uusad ang traffic e baka daw mag-MRT na lang siya sa Shaw. Kaya konting hintay lang mga boys en girls sa US of A at darating din jan c Santa.

Isang ligtas, mapera at masayang Pasko sa mga batang maghahanting ng kanilang ninong at ninang ngayong kapaskohan. Mula sa My Pinoy Humor Blog, Happy Hunting! Sugod mga inaanaaak!

Festivus-The Holiday For the Rest of Us

Festivus is a secular holiday celebrated on December 23rd. It was created by writer Dan O'Keefe and introduced into popular culture by his son Daniel, a screenwriter for the TV show Seinfeld as part of a comical storyline on the show. The holiday's celebration, as shown on Seinfeld, includes an aluminum "Festivus pole", practices such as the "Airing of Grievances" and the "Feats of Strength", and the labeling of easily explainable events as "Festivus miracles". [wiki]

As Frank Costanza aka Jerry Stiller would say "Until you pin me, George, Festivus is not over!" Happy Festivus for the rest of us!

Secret Love at Tattoo ni Santa Claus

Last minute pahabol e-card para sa mga katribo. Let's ink Santa then send the kumikembot video ni Santa Claus to a friend or love ones. O tatoan na! Isang click lang here.

Paskong Balikbayan Box

Kung pwede lang sumakay sa balikbayan box sana ay nadiyan na ako sa piling mo. Maligayang Pasko sinta ko.

Guaranteed White Christmas

Katatapos lang ng mala Ondoy snowstorm dito sa aming barangay. Nagsimula ito sa Florida at humagupit pataas hanggang dito sa New England. Kanselado ang mahigit na 65% of local flight kaya apektado lahat ang biyahe from JFK International Airport up to the bus terminal sa Cubao. Less than a foot of snow ang bumuhos dito samantalang 21 inches naman sa ibang estet. Kaya mula dito sa harap ng bahay eh binabati ko kayo ng isang Maligayang Garantisadong White Christmas!

On the fourth day of Christmas

My true love sent to me
Four DSLR mounted on a Segway.

Finger Licking Noche Buena

Isang piniger licking Seasons Greetings from Col. Gringo Sanders. Bring home a bucket of Caintaky Fried Chicken today. Baket? Kasi fried of Cainta, Rizal gid yan. O buy na bay!

Beatles Christmas with The Fab Four

Sila ang the best Beatles tribute band para sa akin, hindi pa yan tumira din ang The Fab Four ng Christmas songs ala Bitols. Una ko 'tong narinig sa Good Morning America, watch mo yung video sa ibaba. Ang linis ng areglo, hindi halata, parang Comelec. Ang galeng ng intro, Beatles song turning into well known Christmas songs na kinalakihan natin. Ha! Paano yun? Well just buy "A Fab Four Christmas: The Ultimate Beatles Tribute CD" habol sa pasko. O Google mo na.

Ang Ninong kong TNT

Marami ng Pasko ang nagdaan
Ngunit ang ninong ko ay hindi ko matagpuan
Nang aking hanapin ang sabi ng aking ninang,
doon sa beergarden lagi daw nag-iistambay
Nasaan ka ninong di kita makita
Ang aginaldo ko ibigay mo sana
Ang utang mo sa'kin ay anim na pasko na
Umuwi ka na ninong at Pasko na

Gusto mo ba ng Green Card?

Katatapos lang ng "Green Card", ang comedy-musical play written and directed by Dandin Ranillo na tinanghal sa Edna's Ichiban Library sa San Francisco. Del Monte? Hindee... California.

Starring syempre si pareng JOJI ISLA, DANDIN RANILLO, ANGELIKA DEL CARMEN,LOUELLA ALBORNOZ, JUNI RANILLO, THAGE MONTECARLO, CRYSTAL DORADO, PAM SERRANO, KITCHIE RANILLO, MAIA USI, RICHARD KEMPIS and BING GARCIA. With the special participation of SUZETTE RANILLO and FE DE LOS REYES. Para doon po sa hindi nakapanood eh nadito ang mga sample ng GREEN CARD, panoorin naten.

Oompa Loompa Greedypadee Doo

Oompa Loompa Doompadee Dah
If you're not greedy you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Not like the Oompa
Oompa Loompa greedypadee do

Pinoy Santa vs. AA Santa Claus

Bakbakan ng Santa Claus, fight! Sino kaya ang panalo? Pinoy Santa versus AA Santa (Alcoholics Anonymous o sa tagalog sunog baga) Hulaan ninyo kung sino si Pinoy Santa. Balita ko kandidato cya para bise presidente. Mahilig din yang maglamay gabi gabi.

Pinoy Pulutan (export quality)

Mga kapatid na OFW miss mo na ba ang mga pinoy pulutan like, barbeque na baboy, IUD, betamax, crash helmet (ulo ng manok) at ang pinakamarap sipsiping Adidas? Pwes huwag mabahala, available na po sa inyung suking Pilipino store ang Adidas na class! Selyado, garantisadong fresh at pinagtibay sa formalin. Ternong terno sa Ginebra San Miguel in sachet. O ano ang hinihintay nyo? Pasko? Inuman na!

Gliding Through The Snow

Happy Holidays card ang dumating ngayon dito sa Pinoy Humor Blog mula sa Segway Inc. Maski na hindi ninyo natatanong eh itanong na din ninyo kung isa tayo sa early adopters ng Segway seven years ago. Nakarating pa yan sa Maynila at Subic noong 2003. OK sa olrayt ang glider natin at kundisyon pa rin, kayang kayang mag gliding through the snow habang nagjijingle ang balls natin sa lamig! Happy Holidays!

Today's blog is brought to you by the letter...

UST baha by Ashley D. Cristal

GMA's Christmas Card

Some Random Thoughts (Questions) on the Declaration of Martial Law in Maguindanao:

1. If there was massive cheating in Maguindanao in the previous elections and if indeed the Ampatuans were involved, do the perpetrators have evidence to use against the benefactors should the occasion arise?

2. As a result of the heinous crime of massive massacre in Maguindanao earning the ire, indignation and condemnation not only of a nation but also of the world, the political party of the Ampatuans and the public personalities known to be closed and indebted to them have distanced themselves from and disowned the Ampatuans. But not only that. With the public loud outcry for justice, it could not be helped but to have them arrested. Would not these developments constitute the occasion for the Ampatuans to retaliate and expose what they know if they were indeed involved in the massive election cheatings?

3. If this indeed would be the compelling time for them to use the evidences, if any, would the declaration of martial law in Maguindanao be the best opportunity to search for these evidences along with the armaments and munitions - seized and stashed away by a chosen group so that the threat of massive election cheating exposure (a very critical disadvantage especially at this point) would be eliminated forever?

4. Are not CAFGUs, CVOs, and the like official creations of the AFP established for anti-insurgency purposes? Are they not being officially supplied with arms and given assigned areas? If so, why is it that suddenly they are being considered as private armies of the Ampatuans as if the authorities are unaware of these CAFGUs, CVOs, and the like being stationed in the seats of government in Maguindanao?

5. With the glaring extraordinariness, abnormality, & contemptible supply of weaponry in the hands of the powerful clans enough not only to keep a kingdom but also enough to cause a stir /rumblings not only in the civilian populace but also among the good soldiers and officers in the military itself in the likes of Trillanes, et al , would it not be necessary to show that the acquisition of this voluminous high-powered weaponry was surreptitious?

6. With the declaration of martial law in Maguindanao, would the Ampatuans now be charged with rebellion instead of the horrendous crime of treacherous massive massacre?

7. With admittedly about 4,000 troops in Mindanao as against supposedly about 500 in different groups massing (one of the reasons – aside from failure of local govt & judiciary to function, which is questionable according to FLAG lawyer Atty. Jose Manuel Diokno- for the declaration) and the declaration of state of emergency, would not these be enough to bring the culprits to justice?

8. Is the declaration of martial law in Maguindanao a test case? Is the monstrous Maguindanao massacre an isolated case or just part of a more grand design? (very remote but possible, isn’t it?)

email galing sa isa nating kababayan

2009 Unsafe Toy List

Bigayan na naman ng mga laruan ngayong Pasko sa ating mga anak, inaanak at kaanak. Sulabit we have to be proactive when it comes to unsafe toys. Lalo na yung mga murang laruang Made in China na mabibili sa dollar store at Divisoria. Heto po ang short list ng mga unsafe at toxic toys for this year. Ang pina unsafe na atsaka dangerous toy po yung nakalitrato sa ibaba.

Toy Name: Creative Wood Stacking Rings
Manufacturer: Zaidy
Choking hazard; label violation

Toy Name: Real Wood Shape Sorter Barn
Manufacturer: P&C Enterprise
Choking hazard; label violation

Toy Name: Unnamed Play Food Tray
Manufacturer: World Market
Choking hazard; label violation

Toy Name: My First Baby Learn
Manufacturer: Zapf Creation
Choking hazard; label violation

Toy Name: Fur Real Baby Bird
Manufacturer: Hasbro
Choking hazard; label violation

Toy Name: Touch & Feel Cloth Book
Manufacturer: Priddy Books
Contains Lead

Toy Name: Alligator Cell Phone Charm
Manufacturer: Claire’s
Contains Lead

Toy Name: Collector’s Series Painted Duck
Manufacturer: Dollar Tree
Contains Lead

Toy Name: Knight’s Helmet
Manufacturer: Dollar Tree
Contains Lead

Toy Name: Elmo Lunch Bag
Manufacturer: Fast Forward New York
Phthalates in excess of ban

via unsafetoylist

The Official Obama's Christmas Card

Just got a Christmas card from Barack, Malia, Sasha and Michelle Obama by snail mail. It is a simple family portrait of the first family. Teka minute... kasama din pala sina Tareq and Michaele Salahi.

Winterized Madonna

Cloudy with a chance of fishballs este flurries mixed with freezing rain ang weather forecast ng aming Pagasa dito sa barangay, sulabit 4 to 5 inches ang bumaksak kagabi. Buti na lang at winterized na ang Madonna ni Mang Temyong. Hindi ko na nasilip yung Bathtub Madonna at Bathtub Jesus. Sana balot na din sila ng plastic for winter.

Hey Boy Avatarize Yourself!

Pinoy Avatar

Sino ba 'tong na Avatarize naten? Si Boy Abunda o si Tado? Hala hula, hula sa mandaraya. Kung type ninyong ma Avatarize eh upload lang nimo ang imong piktyurs dine.

Uncut Celebrities o Parada ng mga Supot

Big deal sa ating mga pinoy ang tule. Kawawa ka kung mabistong supot. Yari ka sa tukso at kantyaw ng barkada. Dito hindi big deal yan, kaya heto na po ang parada ng mga aprobadong celebrities na supot. John Mayer, Ricky Martin, Elvis Presley, Leonardo DiCaprio, Nicolas Cage, Keanu Reeves, Will Smith atsaka si Johnny Mathis (sungaw). O marami pang potsu dito.

Ulo ng Bansa

Olrayt boys en girls, pop quiz tayo ngayon kung kilala ninyo ang mga (pang) ulo ng mga bansa sa balat ng Earth. Hindi po nanay ni Conan O'Brien yung isa jan. Ok, walang kopyahan. 50 world leaders ang huhulaan naten dito.

Tiger Woods 10 Cheats

Ten ang cheats sa Tiger Woods PGA Tour video game (google mo), pero sa totoong buhay eh tatatlo pa lang ang lumulutaang na cheats ni Tiger. Ha! tatlo lang! (chuwariwap ni Erap at Singson) Sabida me pagka-waray daw itong si Elin Nordegren. Hinambalos ng 7 iron si Tiger pati na both side windows at likod ng Escalade. Pero winasak lang daw (kindat) kuno (ehem) ni Elin ang car windows to rescue niya si Mr Woods. Victor? Hindee! Tiger! Ano kaya ang totoo? Abangan ang susunod na kabanata.

New Reality TV Show

President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo whose term expires in 2010 has filed her certificate of candidacy for mayor of Munchkin Town, Pampanga.